Things That Go Bump in the Night

Every day is an adventure here, just some more than most. Last night was a really weird one -- we have an interfone (where someone rings the bell at the gate, and you can pick up a phone in your house and talk to them and let them in or not), and the telephone part isn't working. Someone decided that they desperately needed us to let them in the gate, and so they pressed and held onto the button. More than once. It got really frustrating after awhile knowing that I couldn't do anything about that, but it finally stopped.
About 20 minutes later (because it was definitely one thing after another), our doorbell started ringing. After a few times my roommate asked me to go downstairs with her to see who was at the door. We looked outside, and there was no one there. Creepy.... We called Ray (one of the missionaries that we work with) and he came to look at our doorbell, which by this point was ringing about once every 3 minutes. He took the box off the bricks outside, and lo and behold! There were animals that had gotten in there (a lizard and a spider). You would have thought they were poisonous. We are now doorbell-free and sleeping well.

So I am the type of person who likes lists. I like to make them and I like to check them off. I have to confess that I have been trying to do that in relationships (not to mention everyday life, some of which requires an agenda -- writing things down and actually getting them done). My errant thinking consisted in thoughts that there was a "right" way to be in a relationship or that there was a cookie-cutter mold that I and this other person were supposed to fit into. That includes both friends and family.
I am learning that I can't put relationships in a box, just as I can't put people in a box. Limits are good, and confinement is bad. Confining someone else to our own opinions and thoughts of them is like putting a goldfish in a small bowl. Our knowledge of them (and theirs of us) only grows as much as we will let it. And if there is no room to grow, whatever we have boxed in will eventually die.
Relationships are so much more than a list -- they are the stuff our lives are made of. They may last until death, or they may be given to us for a shorter time. What I am learning is that I should enjoy them for the gifts that they are.